and the goodbyes begin

I guess good things always don't last..and goodbyes come eventually.

ONE DAY LEFT...

I have been getting plenty of texts from people asking me how i am doing. I love that people are thinking of me and worried/excited for me. I guess i don't really have an answer to give them because i am every possible emotion. I am sad to leave this family, the friends i've made out here, and the life i have made. But i have something better thats waiting for me, my best friend..Joshua!! He will be home in one week.. and i know that the second i see his face and give him a hug that this will all be worth it!!

This past week i have been packing..packing is not easy for me. I just get frustrated that everything has to fit in two suitcases.. uggghh!! If i had my car then it wouldn't be that much of an issue, but flying home makes it a little bit harder. This is what i hate about traveling: baggage fee's, security, carry on's and getting on and off of the plane. I think probably because i have been on a plane so many times in the last year, i am done with planes for a while!! I do like people watching at the airport though, that's fun..there are some very interesting people out there.

On Sunday i gave my last lesson as Relief Society 1st counselor and said goodbye to a lot of my amazing friends that i have made. Wednesday nights are volleyball nights so my cute friends being who they are made me TWO cute cakes and got me balloons!! They are the best!! Honestly i am going to miss them all so much. I'll be back to visit, so i know i will see most of them again. 

***

now onto the saddest part..

i can't believe that i have to say goodbye to this family.

I truly am so blessed to have been apart of their lives for 9 months..i wouldn't trade this for anything in the world. I am so thankful for them and for treating me like a daughter and sister! I cannot say it to their faces or i will cry, so i will do my best here..

Brian- Thank you for everything. For looking after me like your own and worrying about my safety! Thanks for letting me drive your car.. ;) Thank you for being an amazing daddy to the kids, it has shown me that hard work pays off and that making time for your kids is the most important. Thank you for the amazing laughs, and the stories! With me gone, you wont have anyone to talk to about baseball, football or basketball anymore.. haha!! 

Deanna- Where to start..I never thought that by the end of the 9 months that we would have such an amazing relationship. I will cherish it forever! The many inside jokes, quoting movie lines, and watching crazy stupid videos! I can't thank you enough for everything you have done for me. You have helped me understand to enjoy my "teenage years" while i can..and to stay young!! Thank you for your kindness and for the love you always show towards me, just like your own :)

Vivian- I am so proud of the girl you have become in just the short months i have been here! You have grown so much, and you will only continue to grow! Keep up with your soccer skills, you are good..and you will only become better (remember what i taught you!). I think of you as my second little sister, you truly are so special to me. Don't every quit and keep trying, you will go places i know you will!!

Scott- Never has a little boy taught me so much! I would have never put up a thousand dominos, slept in a tent in the playroom, or did robot around the house dancing crazy to music if it weren't for your amazing spirit. You have changed my life immensely, and my love for you has only gotten stronger. You are so special and i can't think of another boy who deserves the world more than you do! 

Zachary- My best/cutest little buddy! I loved eating oreo's, coloring, and watching Spongebob everyday with you after school. You have grown into a boy in the short time i have been here, you just kept surprising me! I am going to miss you coming into my room giving me a big hug, kissing me and telling me how much you loved me and that i was beautiful!! I can honestly say the cutest 5 year old i have ever seen :)

and to the Marmor Family as one, what can i say more than i love you all!! Thank you for teaching me, pushing me and putting up with my blonde moments, laughs, and my stupid stories!  I know this won't  be the end of our friendship because i promise i am coming back and i will see you again in the future :) You all will hold a special place in my heart! Remember i am just a phone call, text or FaceTime away!

I will no longer be a New Yorker..bittersweet feeling

everything happens for a reason

five.more.weeks.  

say what???

I've made a lot of decisions in my life thus far..but none quite this big..and one that has changed my life so immensely

I know that i didn't come out to New York for any odd reason..i know i came out here to meet the many amazing people that i have met. I know that if i wasn't LDS that i wouldn't have made as many friends. All the people that i hang out with go to church with me and that's such a blessing. I know how many people that i have met will always have a special place in my heart.

i came out to New York not knowing anyone..not even the family i came out here to nanny. I came out here with full trust in The Lord that everything would be perfect, and because i prayed and asked my Heavenly Father if this was right..i knew without a doubt that this was where my life was taking me.

New York City...a place that is so intimidating. 

I got off that plane, not even knowing if my host family was going to be real, if my host dad was going to be there to pick me up. I traveled across the United States out of full courage..all by myself. I would be lying if i didn't say i was scared. I was nervous, excited, and possibly every emotion you could think of when that plane landed in New York City. 

I remember i said a prayer before i made it to the escalator's to go find my bags, that this would all be in the plan..and now 8 months in..i know for a fact that this was where i was needed at this time in my life.

plans change, and you just have to keep on going. 

I would never change this experience here in New York for anything in this world. It has made me realize things in my life that i wouldn't have if i didn't come out here. The family has taught me things i hope for my future family, and has taught me things i don't want for my family. I hope that through this experience i have helped them become closer as a family, and brought them happiness. Not only by being their nanny, but becoming their friend! I hope that when i leave here in 5 weeks that i will be missed and that they will always remember me!

These weeks that are coming are so bittersweet 

My life has been changed for the better. I have grown emensley through this journey, and though it has only been 8 months..i feel like i am apart of this family! And i am going to miss that

but....

My life is starting a new chapter
MY MISSIONARY IS COMING HOME!!!!
The love of my life. my best friend. my other half. my everything

I get home from New York on Friday, June 21st and Josh gets home Thursday, June 27th

SIX DAYS
I couldn't be more excited. I have been waiting two years for this moment in time..and even though it's not here, i am close enough that i can see the finish line. That alone, is worth the two years!! I can't imagine what it will be like when he gets home! I am beyond excited :)

So for the couple weeks that i have left in New York, i am going to live it up and love every minute that i have left with this amazing family! I am beyond excited for the girl that will replace me (i know her, so that makes me happy!), and i know they will always be in good hands..but that doesn't take away the pain of having to eventually say goodbye to these kids, even though i know i'll see them again. Until then.. it will be a party! :)

Brian or Deanna, if you are reading this.. i want to dedicate this song to you guys! Thank you for everything :)

i love new york :)

Make your own sunshine

Lately i have been getting compliments on how happy i always am!!I have always been a happy person..but lately getting those compliments has mad me realize that i have been extremely happy and has made me wonder..I think that i am in a place in my life where everything is perfect and going just

the way that Heavenly Father has planned it out to be! 

and that makes me really happy

so i am giving you all a quest..find your own sunshine!

be happy. laugh. and love your life

Everything wont always go your way, but i know that in time everything will workout exactly how planned..so make your own sunshine!!

I think i put off doing this for so long and then i realize that i have so many pics i want to share, so then i end up getting mad at myself for waiting to long.. oh well!

Well a little update on my life.

I have 2.5 months left..i don't even know where time is going..its crazy!! I keep thinking i still have like 5 or 6 months left, but its going to come sooner then i think and i won't be ready. That will be a very sad day when i leave, i am not looking forward to that day to much. I know that my time was well spent though and with the most amazing family ever too :)

Friends 

I am so blessed to have made so many friends out here!! They are all so fun and amazing :) It's made me realize that there is a completely different world outside of Utah. I will forever be grateful for the friends i have made out here!

Me and Lauren shopping one saturday :)

Port Jeff that night

of course my sand writing

Some of the girls in my branch at Stake Relief Society meeting

Yes i am wearing a sister missionary tag :)
Some missionaries and fellow branch members!

Elder LeBaron and Elder Munday both serving in the
New York, New York South Mission. All from American Fork, Utah
and all in New York right now! Crazy crazy small world :) 

Elder Perry came and talked at Stake Conference
in Plainview, New York. Amazing amazing man :)
soo very blessed to have these men on this earth today

Friends since tiny! Elementary, junior high, and a
year of high school together!! 

                                                                                ***

  My little angels 

Don't know how i am going to be able to say goodbye to these kids when June 21st arrives. I am not looking forward to that day at all!!I will forever be grateful for this family and how they have made me grow up and learn about myself in such a different way. These kids will forever be in my heart forever, i have grown to love and care for these kids!!

Scotty (7)

Zachary (4)

Vivian (10)

Me and zachary's sleepover a couple weeks ago!
he had been begging me to sleep over in my room
for a couple weeks, but i had been really sick for a week
or so, so when i was better we had our sleep over :)

Easter morning with the kids!! soo much fun :)

Me and vivian on Easter! She looks amaze :)

The boys at the circus :) My first circus!!

                                                                              ***

Bahamas, Atlantis/Paridise Island

My host family was so amazing and kind enough to invite me on family vaca with them! Yes of course i went to help take care of the kids, but none the less that was the best part about going was being with the kids all day :)  So many pics..not enough space to put them all on here!

Amazing view from my room 

waiting in line at breakfast!

playing around in the ocean with these cuties

My best friend :)

Went swimming with the dolphins

My handsome boys

loving life :)

My little buddy!! This boy loved running on the beach

Snorkeling in the ocean :)

Kissing this biggggg fishy

kisssy kissy dolphin :)

         These next couple of months are going to be a little insane!! We have a lot going on..which is good so that it will keep me busy and my mind off of everything else!! These next 2.5 months are going to fly by, but be the best months thus far :) 

xoxo- Brinley jan

                                                                             

                                                                               

have big dreams..you will grow into them

I never in a million years would have thought that i would be where i am today.  I had a million dreams and quote "to live in a big city" was one of them..now i can cross that off my list and dream 

even bigger!!

My journey has been amazing, its helped me grow and become someone who loveslife and the journey that life throws at me. 3.5 months left...and i still won't be readyto leave at that time. 

wow.. time is flying by so fast

it FREAKS me out sometimes..i have 3 months left here. 

where did the time go?

This is exactly how i feel about Josh's mission, he gets home in 4.5 months!! Its honestly the weirdest feeling to think that i am almost done in New York and than when i get home Josh will be home soon after. I couldn't have imagined it any better than this!

Update on my life..

Mormon Helping Hands 

We finished up an entire house. From top to bottom
It's amazing to see the difference many hands can make

Many early morning and long days..but we had a blast!!

****

Amazing friends

I had to say goodbye to two of my amazing friends!! I don't know what i am 

going to do without them here with me, i am so very sad that they are gone.

Last sunday with my girl..i was sooo sad!! Miss my girl so much!!
Krista come backkkkk!!!

Had to say bye to one of my best friends back home!!
Miss her like crazzyy

****

Valentines Day 

 I got to spend my Valentines Day with the 3 sweetest kids!!! My little angels :)

You could say that my Valentines Day was amazing :)

****

Home 

I got to go home and spend a couple of days there

My cute nephew Van!! Seriously crazier than ever :)

Got to meet my beautiful and perfect niece Remington Rae Anderson!
She's the most perfect thing!!

Remi :)

This little ball of joy is the cutest boy you've ever met!! 

****

Bye bye Utah

At the airport i saw Josh's parents, Paul and Kay :)
They went to Hawaii to get some sun, and i headed back to the beautiful NYC 

****

Couldn't love a city more!! This has been the best decision in my life hands down!

I wouldn't trade it for anything. Have so many more things to see and explore, 

and with the good weather coming around the corner..i get to do them!! 

I could not love this lady more!!! Seriously my idol :)

Stephy's first sunday!! She is an aupair from Austria..we love her :)

West coast > East coast

My branch is the best!!! ^^^

The time of my life

 

4 months...i cannot believe that i only have 4 months left here in amazing 

New York 

It's amazing to realize why I am suppose to exactly where i am, right now. 

Last week it hit me that i was out here to be with this family. The way things worked out. The way that i fit perfectly in the family. The timing. The amazing friends i have made. The people i have met for some reason or another. The hardships and trials i have run into. The most memorable time of my life. 

I honestly can't think of a better way to spend these past couple months than out here with the most perfect host family. They have been nothing but amazing to me. I cannot complain a bit. And to hear other nannies out here complaining about there families, i kinda just laugh inside and smile because i know that mine is by far the best! (this family needs a nanny starting in the summer..hint hint)

I ask myself all the time how i got so lucky? I even just catch myself asking others how i got so lucky with this family? I must have known that it was right all along because i trusted my entire life with them  by coming out here and trusting that everything would be okay...it turned out to be more than okay, it has been amazing! 

I know i have 4 more months left..but honestly these past 5 months have been everything i could want and more. Not always easy, but it ain't easy always right?

I am learning so much from this family..so much that i wouldn't have if i didn't come out here! I now know that trusting yourself and running with a good feeling isn't always gonna turn out bad. There is always opposition, but when you look back and realize what you have accomplished..nothing feels better. I have grown closer to my Heavenly Father by trusting, praying, and counting all of my amazing blessings that i have been given. There isn't a time in my life when i have felt closer to my Heavenly Father.The Gospel is such a blessing in my life and i don't know what i would do without it, i wish everyone who doesn't have it, will one day know what its like to be truly happy!! It's amazing to see your life change from good and not thinking it could be any better, to amazing when new people come into your life!! 

I truly am the luckiest person in the world. I have an amazing family. Boyfriend. Friends. And Host Family and i truly know that is all because of the decisions and life that i have chosen. I wouldn't want to have it any other way! I must have done something right to be given so much :)

Typical Wednesday night playing Volleyball and ping pong 

Three cutest kids in the world!! Vivi, Scott, Zac 

Our weekly Saturday service 

Last time in the City with us three!! They are both leaving me :(

Me holding the statue of liberty at Battery Park

Some more Saturday Service. Amazing opportunity
for missionary work!

Battery Park